Oh the joys of trying to plan a wedding. I just didn't know there was this much involved. All of the little details that part of me worries about and the other part says who cares....this leads to procrastination which actually drives that one side of me crazy and is the life of the party on the other side. No wonder Justin never knows what kind of mood I'll be in when I see him.
My pastor is not doing well. It's been a while since we found out that he had cancer but he is not gone yet and I am simply irritated by everyone who has let go of him already. I just had an epiphany that maybe I'm supposed to be letting go as well so that God can do his work or so that God can take him home. I don't really feel bad that pastor Jim is dying because he has been in so much pain lately that I just want to see his suffering ended. I'm angry at myself for not feeling bad and not crying. I didn't even cry when I lost grandpa a couple weeks ago. part of me wonders if it's because i don't feel anything. Just wondering, which is something I do a lot of lately. Needed to get this out of my system so I can focus on other things right now. More pressing things, maybe not more important.
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