Once again I am stressed out about classes because every one of my professors says "let's have a group project it will be fun" I have news for every professor who says that--you are a liar. These projects are not fun and very few of them are really even productive because we will not use them later in life when I have a group project for my oppression class.
I am ready to be done and people tell me that everyone feels that way in the home stretch but I have been ready to be done since week 2 of Freshman year in college. This is not where I want to be but I feel like God is telling me keep it up, just a little while longer and you will get a reward. I almost ask myself is the reward worth it but then I realize that God knows me better than I know myself and the reward will not be a dinner but something much more valuable.
The reward might even include a husband if I don't scare him off before that, not that I'm seriously concerned about this. He hasn't been scared off yet and he has met my entire family several times. He has been to funerals with me. He has been to weddings with me. We have watched his niece grow up in the same house with him. He will be an awesome Dad someday. I love him with all my heart and I thank God that he allowed me to make certain decisions that I normally would have regretted that actually have lead me to a greater understanding of my wonderful boyfriend. Because without my previous experiences I would not understand some of the tough times that will lay ahead for us and some of the tough things that we have already overcome. I would not seriously understand some of the temptations that lay in wait every day that I see him. I would not ever be able to resist them without serious intervention on God's part because I am only human with human flesh and a willingness to do human things.
I am thankful for the events that have been a part of my life and I always forget to thank God that I have been in the midst of family and friends who have been supportive through it all. I do not know where I would be without some of them.
I am also sad because I have been thinking a lot about Grandpa lately and how much I don't miss him. I feel guilty for not missing him at times and then other times I think about the milestones in my life that he is not going to be present for and that makes me a little angry. He is not here to see his first great grand baby born-not that we know when it will happen but he should have been here.
As for Pastor Jim, I know that he is feeling much better now. But he was supposed to do the pre-marriage counseling with Justin and I. He was supposed to be the one to lead us in our vows. I know that is what he wanted as well but it just isn't the time yet. Justin and I both feel we did the right thing by not rushing into a marriage just on the fact that Pastor Jim was not doing well and that's who we wanted to officiate the ceremony. We have things to prepare before we are ready to be husband and wife and part of that includes me finishing school. I'd like to see him finish his degree as well since he only has a couple classes left and then we will both be able to move forward with a different page in our lives being turned simultaneously.
I am ready to be done and people tell me that everyone feels that way in the home stretch but I have been ready to be done since week 2 of Freshman year in college. This is not where I want to be but I feel like God is telling me keep it up, just a little while longer and you will get a reward. I almost ask myself is the reward worth it but then I realize that God knows me better than I know myself and the reward will not be a dinner but something much more valuable.
The reward might even include a husband if I don't scare him off before that, not that I'm seriously concerned about this. He hasn't been scared off yet and he has met my entire family several times. He has been to funerals with me. He has been to weddings with me. We have watched his niece grow up in the same house with him. He will be an awesome Dad someday. I love him with all my heart and I thank God that he allowed me to make certain decisions that I normally would have regretted that actually have lead me to a greater understanding of my wonderful boyfriend. Because without my previous experiences I would not understand some of the tough times that will lay ahead for us and some of the tough things that we have already overcome. I would not seriously understand some of the temptations that lay in wait every day that I see him. I would not ever be able to resist them without serious intervention on God's part because I am only human with human flesh and a willingness to do human things.
I am thankful for the events that have been a part of my life and I always forget to thank God that I have been in the midst of family and friends who have been supportive through it all. I do not know where I would be without some of them.
I am also sad because I have been thinking a lot about Grandpa lately and how much I don't miss him. I feel guilty for not missing him at times and then other times I think about the milestones in my life that he is not going to be present for and that makes me a little angry. He is not here to see his first great grand baby born-not that we know when it will happen but he should have been here.
As for Pastor Jim, I know that he is feeling much better now. But he was supposed to do the pre-marriage counseling with Justin and I. He was supposed to be the one to lead us in our vows. I know that is what he wanted as well but it just isn't the time yet. Justin and I both feel we did the right thing by not rushing into a marriage just on the fact that Pastor Jim was not doing well and that's who we wanted to officiate the ceremony. We have things to prepare before we are ready to be husband and wife and part of that includes me finishing school. I'd like to see him finish his degree as well since he only has a couple classes left and then we will both be able to move forward with a different page in our lives being turned simultaneously.
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